Circus Giganticus

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The Empire Smokes Crack

October 21st, 2009 · No Comments · Wentworth and Wiggmann Wednesday

Wentworth: Wiggy, I’m perusing this book, The Right Way to Know Things, and it makes some crazy-ass claims.

Wiggmann: Do tell ,old egg.

Wentworth: Well, it so claims that the root causes of social and political problems in America can be attributed to America’s acceptance of the gay lifestyle, a liberal media, and terrorists who hate our freedoms.

Wiggmann: Is it logical to think of these people as right.

Wentworth: No it is right to think of these people as proctological!

____ 

Wigmann: Ah Worthy, sometimes the zoo can be so depressing. Captive creatures shambling pointlessly to and fro, instincts neutered, minds blank, each day a sentence that must be served, an existence of spiritual confinement re-foretold everyday.

Wentworth: Sorry old chum, my mind was drifting. What part of Cleveland were you talking about?

_____ 

Wentworth: There is a place of evil that shadows the land, Wiggmann. It gathers itself to visit evil and sorrow unto man. This evil dispatches dark emissaries and foul magic to harry the earth and its inhabitants. It knows no pity and disavows all living things that pledge no allegiance to its infernal design. It is the bringer of doom!

Wiggmann: Yes, Worthy, Wal-Mart sucks but I brought you éclairs.

Wentworth: The Fellowship accepts certain reversals.

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